thepanicroom | April Test Drive Meme

If you are planning to app to the game, please read this page and vote in the poll!

S.S. Panic

Test Drive Meme

A quick rundown

Welcome to the S.S. Panic's Test Drive Meme! Here, you can post a top level post and/or respond to other characters in a variety of situations! As you will find if you glance at the map, the ship is a spider-shaped city that is essentially self-sustaining. It's powered by the Infinite Improbability Drive, which when in use allows for the improbable (and impossible!) to happen and become, well, possible!

Below, you will find an example of what a typical monthly job post will look like. To encourage tagging each other, characters who apply to the game after this test drive meme will earn 100 credits per tag they give to someone else. Considering that new refugees are only given a small amount of money to get them started (around 500 credits), this could be huge!

Normally, job posts (currently empty) will be posted on the last day of the month. Characters can begin working the jobs they sign up for on the 1st of the next month. These jobs will be posted early for the Test Drive Meme and can be considered the official jobs of the month.

For now, all jobs will be the lowest paying jobs at Level 5. As the months go on, Level 4, 3, 2 and 1 jobs will be added appropriately. All characters will begin at Level 5 except in very special, rare situations. Keep in mind that some jobs will remain a constant in job postings (Education, for example) while others will change monthly. Also, players may hire other characters themselves in the future through hiring page. Ordinarily, some jobs will have limited slots, but for the purposes of the Test Drive Meme, all jobs come equipped with unlimited slots.

Finally, if you choose to, you can make whatever happens during the Test Drive Meme game canon if you apply and you are accepted into the game. However, this is not required and if you don't want it to be canon but the players of your character's new CR do and vice versa, this is space with wormholes and the IID. Multiple instances of your character is possible, at least for this month.

If you have questions about how the game works, you can look at the gameplay page or post a question to the FAQ page. Remember, you don't have to post your character doing a job. You can have them arguing about the Babelfish, going shopping, having a fist fight with an alien, etc. The important thing is to have fun!

Monthly jobs

Dining
Level 5: XYZ's Diner needs a chef to prepare 800 pounds of devilled eggs [X Slots]
Level 5: Purple Flesh Eats needs someone to dress in only their undergarments and entertain the diners [X Slots]
Level 5: Peculiar Fat Fast Food is running low on tables and needs someone to serve as living table [X Slots]
Level 5: Branched Humanity Restaurant needs employees to serve as mannequins, remaining completely still for most of the day, scaring guests once every four hours [X Slots]
Level 5: The Happiness Disposal Eatery needs a butcher to chop and serve meat from unknown origins [X Slots]

Industry
Level 5: Uncommonly Boisterous needs inexperienced mechanics to build delicate, miniature grandfather clocks [X Slots]
Level 5: Charm Joy needs human subjects to test the effectiveness of various Emotion Potions [X Slots]
Level 5: Performed Age needs diamond miners to work in unsafe conditions [X Slots]
Level 5: Northward needs as many people as possible to sabotage Southward so that Northward can be the first industry to ship its monthly oil quota [X Slots]
Level 5: Southward needs as many people as possible to sabotage Northward so that Southward can be the first industry to ship its monthly oil quota [X Slots]

Education
Level 5: Sunrise Daycare needs workers to sit children; please do not sit ON them [X Slots]
Level 5: Sunrise Daycare needs children to be sat, but not sat on [X Slots]
Level 5: Midday Elementary needs teachers to teach elementary students [X Slots]
Level 5: Midday Elementary needs elementary students for teachers to teach [X Slots]
Level 5: Sunset High School needs teachers to teach high school students [X Slots]
Level 5: Sunset High School needs high school students for teachers to teach [X Slots]
Level 5: End of the Line University needs professors to teach university students [X Slots]
Level 5: End of the Line University needs university students for professors to teach [X Slots]
Level 5: Fools Against Schools needs class bullies to disrupt classroom activities [X Slots]

Nature Reserve
Level 5: The Nature Reserve needs sweepers to sweep the paths [X Slots]
Level 5: The Nature Reserve needs hologram experts to adjust any malfunctions the sky holograms may experience [X Slots]
Level 5: The Nature Reserve needs bird impersonators to scare local birds away [X Slots]
Level 5: The Nature Reserve needs weather testers to monitor the reserve's weather [X Slots]
Level 5: The Nature Reserve needs joggers to give the reserve a sense of activity [X Slots]

Garbage
Level 5: Recycle Or Else needs people to leave garbage at the door of every apartment to warn against the hazards of not recycling [X Slots]
Level 5: Recycle or Else needs people to go through dumpsters to find and process recyclables [X Slots]
Level 5: The Garbage Disposal district needs waste management specialists to tell the garbage truck drivers what to do [X Slots]
Level 5: The Garbage Disposal district needs incinerator experts to man the incinerators and burn the garbage [X Slots]
Level 5: Garbage Treasure needs people to collect valuable items from the garbage that were mistakenly thrown away [X Slots]

Commercial
Level 5: Great Widow Mall needs a mascot to promote its stores [X Slots]
Level 5: Blushes Between needs kiosk vendors to wear down store goers into buying their erotic plant comics [X Slots]
Level 5: Delightful Endeavor Needs cashiers to work with state of the art abacists; no pen and paper allowed [X Slots]
Level 5: Impossible Determination needs people to help reenact the genocide of a bunch of monsters and to pass out flyers [X Slots]
Level 5: Spliced Peppermint needs stepford smiles to give its workers a break when customers get too unruly [X Slots]

Recreation
Level 5: Always Hugs needs someone to give people free hugs [X Slots]
Level 5: Books A-Plenty needs librarians to organize shelves and manage the front desk [X Slots]
Level 5: Spa Seekers need promoters to pass out flyers [X Slots]
Level 5: Sleep Easy needs people to test prototype sleeping medication and herbal supplements [X Slots]
Level 5: Hug-A-Friend needs people to assist visitors in hugging small, cute animals [X Slots]

Agriculture
Level 5: The Agriculture district needs someone to till rows of dirt in preparation for planting [X Slots]
Level 5: The Agriculture district needs seed sowers to sow vegetable seeds [X Slots]
Level 5: The Agriculture district needs plant waterers to make sure the plants are getting enough water [X Slots]
Level 5: The Agriculture district needs harvesters to pick mature fruit [X Slots]
Level 5: The Agriculture district needs someone to act as a scarecrow to scare away what may or may not be crows [X Slots]
Level 5: Firecracker needs someone to make crop circles in various fields [X Slots]

Night Entertainment
Level 5: Saucy needs strippers to dance in the evenings [X Slots]
Level 5: Always Sticky needs someone to slather clients with severed tentacles [X Slots]
Level 5: Perfect Match needs someone to act as a match maker for refugees and aliens of the ship [X Slots]
Level 5: The Marathon needs gamers of all skill levels to participate in the 300 hour video game marathon [X Slots]
Level 5: Pool Parties R Us needs people to test the floatability of pool tables in various bodies of water [X Slots]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I definitely have not and I have a strong suspicion a lot of people would say the same, but more importantly than your genetic mutations, you seem capable of flight, which is something I am still at the moment astounded by.

Most haven't, hm?

[ 'Mutations' isn't too far off. Very intentionally induced into an entire population of humans, but mutations in a certain sense nonetheless. ]

I do have wings, you know.

In the physical world we live in, wings alone are not enough to generate flight.

Take, for instance, birds. In addition to having wings, their entire bodies are aero-dymanically designed via billions of years of evolution. From the purpose of their feathers, to the shape of their beak, to the lightweight hollow nature of their bones.

[ Sala nods, and nods again - okay she kind of likes this girl already. ]

Very astute! No, I am not very aerodynamic, nor am I light enough for my wings to carry me under my own power - were I a biologist, I'm certain I could explain the forces that aid my wings in providing lift. [ ...may...be... ]

All I can do is assure you that it is not typical flight.

Of course it's not typical.

Even if you had incredibly strength in your wings, they aren't large enough to generate the lift you'd need either. I'm completely stumped.

If only I knew the details, I would gladly tell you of the nature of the energy to provides the necessary lift to overcome my body weight, but alas, that is far from my specialty.

Then I'm going to need to run some tests, whenever you're done here.

It would be more accurate to say 'I am going to ask permission to run some tests, whenever you are done here.'

[ Sala narrows her eyes for a moment. ]

My answer will be 'no' for now.

Well, no, since that's saying the same thing. It's not any more or less accurate. -Social Skills: 0-

But please don't say 'no', this is going to be agonizing until I figure it out.

[ Apparently. ]

Much as I hate to torment you, I will at least need to know the, ah, nature of these tests.

Nothing invasive, I assure you. I will need to take some anatomical data, but they're all simply dimensional. Height, measurements, weight, volume, density. That kind of thing. Then I'll need to measure your energy intake and output levels. Your diet, various physical exercises, things like that.

That does still sound quite time consuming, however; for all that time, I might need to be compensated.

-... Damn.-

I have no means of offering any compensation. Money, food, I'm fresh out of all of that.

Yet you have to resources to carry out such tests?

[ Underfunded scientists are sad, actually. ]

I suppose you'll have to wait until you've either acquired such compensation, or I have the free time and desire to subject myself to your testing. It is an interesting enough idea, I will admit.

Science always comes first.

Since I can't pay in food or credits, maybe I can pay in favors?

I'm not sure I can think of any favors I would need right now - not scientific favors, at any rate.

Science isn't my only skill. -A bald faced lie.-

Then what do you have to offer?

...

I'm sure I could come up with something.

I await your best offer.

...

Let's take a different approach. How about you tell me what you need?

There is a machine, Enryugo - a transforming war machine.

If you cannot somehow help me reacquire that, then I cannot think of anything.

...!

Deal's off. Thank you for your time, though. -And almost immediately, Renko turned to start walking away, crumbling up the page from her notepad with the intention of tossing it into the nearest bin.-

[ Immediately, Sala reached out to touch Renko's shoulder - to delay her. ]

Don't throw it away. Keep your notes. We will be here long enough for me to find something to ask of you.

[ ...mostly she doesn't want to discourage the pursuit of knowledge that much. ]

-Renko didn't turn around.-

Look, I have two hard rules.

One, I don't form partnerships. I already have one, even if she's late.

And second, I don't work with weapons. Or any tools of war.

(no subject)

salamandrill - 2016-04-17 17:21 (UTC) - Expand